Someone asked me today why I was wishing the month of August away. The simple answer?

Because I hate August.

Historically, it's never been a good month for me. August signaled the end of the Summer vacation, the beginning of long practices on the concrete slab in the Florida heat, and worst of all, the start of school. August meant the end of fun summer nights, and the beginning of 5:30am wake up calls. Nights out with friends were replaced by nights spent doing homework and writing essays. WHO in their right mind would enjoy any month that brought all the crap?!

This August, in particular, has been especially terrible. Nothing went the way I wanted it to, and I felt like everything that could have gone wrong, went wrong. I understand not everything can go your way, but hot damn, a little bit would have just fine with me. I've heard of people hating the month of January, and I understand that. January is like the Monday of the year. But to me, August is like the never-ending Thursday; the kind that feel like they last all week long, with no end in sight. Yes, you know good things are on the other side, but damnit, getting there is going to be no easy battle. I was ready to give up two weeks ago and just have someone wake me when September started. I was promptly called Ohmy-emo-i. Thanks.

At a party on Saturday night, a friend and I were comparing terrible months (his was July) and he told me that he had a good feeling for me, and that Saturday was my turning night. I tried to keep that outlook in mind as I went into the week, and I like to think it worked. That being said, I'm excited for the month to end, and to shake this month off and move on to September. I happen to have almost a full week of fun activities planned starting tomorrow, which I like to think is nature's way of helping me celebrate.

In 30 minutes, this dreadful month will be over. I'll wake up in the morning, and August of 2010 will be a thing of the past. New month, new hopes. Don't let me down, September.

It's hot here. SUPER SUPER HOT. Like, not even this hot in Florida, hot, and at least there you can escape to the pool in on the back porch, or the BEACH which is only 45 minutes away (and then you can pick up some Frozen Gold on the way home!)

But here, there's nothing. No New Smyrna Beach, or sparkling pool to stay cool in. And what makes it worse is that most of us have to rely on WMATA and their less than stellar service which means waiting outside for a bus that may never come, and if it does, then it might not have air conditioning....
That "feels like 99" number is a LIE I tell you! It's at least 100 degrees and feels like HELL ON EARTH.

102 on Tuesday...just thinking about it makes me sweat.

Remember when DC looked like this, and we were all like OMG!:
Yeah, me neither.

I miss you, Snowpocalypse.

"Yeah. Age is a bitch..."


"...I better not see this on your facebook, twitter, or blog..."

When I graduated high school, I had these grandiose plans of going to college and coming out with an AMAZING, well-paid job, and would be living The Dream. That would be that. Life would be started, and there would be no looking back.

Fast forward 4 years and 1 economic crisis later, I found myself sitting front-row at my college graduation thinking "Hmm...this is now how I imagined this would go...". Needless to say, I've spent the last year nannying my way through unemployment. It's been an unforgettable experience, to say the least. I've met some of the most adorable, and intelligent little kids, and I've even made friends with (most) of their moms. Being a nanny is so much fun. The hours are great, the pay is fabulous. But it's not what I went to school for, and most certainly not what I dreamt about those 5 years ago when I was gleefully accepting my high school diploma.

It's all coming to an end. You see, I've been keeping a secret from you. I got myself a really sweet internship, doing exactly what I want to be doing, at a company that could not be more perfect for me. Tomorrow is my first day. I've spent the past year looking for this opportunity, and I beyond thrilled that it finally came through for me. While it means saying goodbye to some awesome families I've been working with, it also means that this could finally be the jumpstart I've been anxiously waiting for. I'm nervous, excited, and yet scared to death of how tomorrow is going to go. I'm starting a week after the other interns, so I'm the new girl coming in, after they've already had time to bond and make friends with each other. I've never been good at the first day, let alone being new.

Despite that though, I've been counting down the days until the 16th, and now it's finally here!

After 402 days, my summer vacation is finally coming to an end.

Today, I am Little Miss Grumpy. I have this little raincloud following me around, raining on my parade. Let's go over why:

  • It's been cold, rainy, and gray for two days straight now.
  • The Orlando Magic lost Game 1 and are about to lose Game 2.
  • I'm the only one that seems capable of filling the Brita water filter in my house. And it's always empty when I want some water.
  • I've been expecting a phone call for days, and it still hasn't come.
  • I didn't workout today, even though I should have, and I had no reason not to, except that I just didn't feel like it.
  • The money I deposited on SATURDAY, still hasn't showed up in my bank account yet.
  • I'm broke, broke, broke!
BLAH!! I'm just so GRUMPY!
Things I learned this weekend:

  1. The rate I can consume Wheat Thins is alarming
  2. 3 iced coffees between 7pm and 10pm is not a good idea
  3. Listening to your neighbor's bbq, just makes you feel creepy
  4. The last few episodes of Private Practice were about as interesting as watching paint dry
  5. The Amazing Race can easily disappoint you
Here's a bonus, and you can thank me later:
  • Walk on the Wild Side is a brilliant show

I'm on a self-imposed house arrest for the time being. Mainly because I have no money...like none at all. Last week, when the new and improved Social Safeway opened, I could hardly contain my excitement. I intended to go and "just take a look around", fully intending to do just that. Let me just take a second and discuss how amazing and beautiful this new Safeway is. It's huge, it's got a sushi bar built in, a temperature controlled wine cellar, a wine bar, a Starbucks, a Suntrust, a nut bar, a huge produce section, a gelato bar (!!), the people who work there are absolutely delightful, so many more awesome things, and a genius marketing department. Who rents out the empty store across the street from Whole Foods, just to deck it out with ads for the Safeway just down the street? A genius, that's who. I might have fallen in love with the place.

Anyways...1 hour, a handful of delicious cheese/bread/steak/cake samples, and $30 later, I was on my way home. Everything was on sale! How could I NOT buy the blueberries when they were $.89 a pack? or the wheat thins because they were two-for-ones. It was all stuff I NEEDED, therefore, I must buy. It pained me to not buy any of the wine that was 30% off, only because I was walking home, and didn't need the extra bottle(s) of weight.

So, I spent $30...but I saved $11! SCORE! WIN! I merrily made my way home, basking in the glory that is this new, glorious place, not even a mile away from my house. Goodbye gross Giant! Goodbye over-priced-not-always-worth-it Whole Foods!

Until the next morning when my mom calls to let me know I overdrafted my checking account. Bollocks. Lucky for me, I was able to use my sweet, innocent, I-have-no-idea-how-this-happened voice, and they credited me back the overdraft fee. (Really, I think it was because my mom's been a customer there forever. Like, from back when Dinosaurs ruled the earth.)

I'm so broke, I can't even buy myself an ice coffee. It kind of sucks, and I'm so not digging this whole "being broke" thing. I will say though, on a positive note, I got a lot done today. The DC weather is absolutely divine, and being at the house all day inspired me to get some chores done. I "cleaned" my room, I did laundry, I hand-washed a few of my dresses and shirts, I opened the windows, I caught up on my missed tv (on the porch!), and I cranked out a blog post. However, as awesome and productive as my day has been, I'm sure I won't be able to keep up the productivity for long, and I'll soon be itching to reacquaint myself with civilization.

Even more reason to keep my fingers crossed for a big opportunity hopefully in the works for my (dear God please near!) future. Until then, I'll just have to stick to my homemade iced lattes. Have any awesome, cheap (ie free!), fun things to do?! I'm looking for ideas!
please excuse my naked bed, like i said, i did laundry. it's now fully clothed, i promise

Was my last post confusing enough for you? Yeah, sorry about that. I had to go light on details to avoid more catastrophe, and I had had just enough wine to fuel an emotional driven post. Ah, Friday nights.

So it's Tuesday, May 4th. Um...holy crap 2010 is almost half-way over. It's been almost a year since I graduated, and I've gone absolutely nowhere with my life. Do you know how incredibly depressing that is? I find myself getting overly-excited about finding 40 cents in my bed. Most days are spent tooling around the internet, willing myself to get up and workout, and doing absolutely nothing. But hey, at least I'm not out spending money, right? Except those days I go to lunch, or dinner, pick up a starbucks, or grocery shop. Those are the days I think "I have PLENTY of money in my bank account!" and then promptly freak out and hole myself in my house for the next two days because I'M BROKE. It's a vicious cycle. Oh to be me.

I'm in that point of my life where it's always wedding season. So let's talk for a second about that. Why is it that there are so many damn rules when it comes to weddings? Why does it matter whether you give the gift before the wedding or after? Why are there certain "price" codes you have to follow? Is it acceptable to give the gift in a bag? They sell wedding gift bags, so why wouldn't it be? Do I buy only from the registry, or do I branch out and get them something else in addition? I have decided though, that I need to get married ASAP. The loot these people come out on the other side with is ridiculous. I'll gladly take six months of wedding planning headaches in exchange for a kitchenaid mixer and some other shiny new toys. Not to mention the gorgeous wedding photos. So not fair, you engaged people have all the fun!

In other news, I'm still unemployed. I still have my "part time nannying" gigs, which keep me afloat for now, and have provided some pretty sweet opportunities (hello England! I'm comin' for you in a few weeks!) but I really wish I had something a little more...valid. Hear of opportunities in the Advertising/PR/Anything business? Because I'M AVAILABLE!

Anyways, I've spent way too much of my time being productive here, so I'm off to will myself out of bed and perhaps even shower. Try not to be jealous of the lifestyle I lead.

When I was little, I used to try and make my mom make promises to me.

"Can we go tomorrow?"
"Maybe." she would respond
"Why only maybe?" I would ask
"Because I don't like to make promises I don't know if I can keep."

I was always taught that once you've made a commitment, that's it. You're in it til the end, and unless there are absolutely unavoidable circumstances, you're bound to meet those requirements. I always try very hard to follow through with what I promise. I've never made plans with the intention of breaking them. I've never intentionally stood someone up. Until tonight.

Things happened so fast, I barely had time to process them.

"Don't go. Don't call. We'll take care of it." I was instructed. And I listened. I ignored phone calls, and I let messages go unanswered. It's like I disappeared.

I don't know what to do. I feel helpless, and terrible for my actions, despite the fact that I'm told I shouldn't, and I did nothing wrong, and there's no one to feel bad for. Naturally, that just makes me feel bad about feeling bad. I know that the way things unfolded tonight were not planned, and the decisions that were made were done so with the best of intentions at heart. I trust them, and I love them, and their opinions mean everything to me. But still, I can't help but feel sad about everything.

All night long I've been struggling with "did I do the right thing?" or "did should I gone about it differently?" I think I made the right choice. I want to believe I made the right choice. But every few minutes, my mind changes again, I'm not quite sure.
Kicking my day off at 5:30am isn't something I've done since high school. I'm afraid it just might kill me.
  1. Coffee
  2. The promise of a PARTYYYY tomorrow night!
  3. Coffee
  4. PAY DAY to help cover the massive expenses of said PARTYYYY.
  5. Coffee. Lots and lots of coffee.
I think that covers it.
Making friends is a funny business. There are certain people that have been in my life for so long, I don't even remember meeting them, they've always just been there. And then there are others that I only just met, that I've become fast friends with. I've never understood that song "Make New Friends". You know, the one that says "one is silver and the other is gold..." to me, all of my friends were on the same level. I thought it was pretty mean to classify your friends as either being silver or gold, because one is obviously worth more than the other. I mean, hello! if it were an Olympic competition, I definitely want the GOLD and not the Silver. That song just seemed mean.

That quote, "some people are meant to stay in your life while others are just meant to make an appearance", I couldn't agree more. I like having friends. They are what make my life complete. I recently ran into someone I used to be good friends with while on the metro. It was the most awkward 90 seconds of my life. Here was this person sitting directly across from me on a crowded metro car, that I haven't seen or spoken to in years. It was a jam-packed car, but really, it felt like it was just us. We used to share everything, and we were the best of friends, but now we couldn't be any farther away from what we were. We exchanged pleasantries, briefly inquired about each others lives, and then the car filled with even more people, my stop came up, so I just got off the train. I didn't know what to say after that. "It was nice to see you" didn't really seem appropriate, because I didn't really know if it was. Seeing her that day completely threw me off. I would like to say it was great, but you could cut the tension between us with a knife. It was weird, and awkward, and kind of sad. I was reminded of all our great memories, and then our sad ending, all in a span of a minute in and a half.

I know that not everyone that comes into our lives will stay there. In fact, different people fit as friends at different points of our life. Certain people leave bigger imprints on our hearts than others. We need different people at different times.

And I'm OK with that.
I think it's safe to say that the Olympics inspires us all. Whether you're four years old and make that life-changing decision to be just like the athletes on tv, or you're 45 years old sitting back in awe of the huge stunts performed by the 21 year olds on the half-pipe, we get inspired. Every two years, we glue ourselves to the television set for fourteen days, and watch as the world competes for the title "Olympic Champion". We come together as a nation. It doesn't matter if we're Republican or Democrat, or what our personal thoughts are on Torte Reform. We all raise our hands in the air and scream wildly at the sight of our home flag rising above the rest. We tear up at the sound of our National Anthem, playing so sweetly to the intimate audience of 4 billion. And although we watch from our living rooms, bar stools, and dorm common rooms, we watch together, and we feel just as proud and ecstatic about the medals earned as the athletes do. Because, while they win for themselves on one level, they also win for us on another.

Really, so few of us will grow up to compete in the Olympic Games, and even fewer will be coronated as"Olympic Champions". And the truth of the matter is, if you're reading this right now, your shot at an Olympic medal is probably nothing more than a distant fantasy of "what might have been". But that's ok. We move on to other dreams and goals. We push ourselves in different ways, and we leave the medal winning to other people.


Just because we don't have the title of "Olympic Champion" on our resumes, doesn't mean we don't have Golden Moments. Sometimes, they come in small packages like making it to the gym 5 out of 7 days. Or when a 2.5 year old tells you she missed you. Maybe it'll be finally getting that promotion you worked so hard for. Or maybe, it'll just be one of those days where everything falls into place perfectly. So, for the rest of this year, I challenge you to look for the Golden Moments in your lives. I can guarantee they won't come daily, maybe not even weekly, but they'll be there. And when they come, soak them up. Absorb them. Feel great about yourself, and don't let anyone knock you off the podium.

Afterall, we may lead ordinary lives but we can certainly have extraordinary days.
The Blizzard is coming! The Blizzard is coming! It's Snowpacalypse!Snowmageddon!Snowdiculous! It's SnOMG!!!!

When the weather-man tells you that "20-30" inches is expected on Friday, and then another "10-20" inches again the next Tues-Wednesday, don't be down on yourselves! Gather up your housemates, invite a few friends over, stock up on food, booze, games, and toilet paper, and hunker down for SNOW CAMP! Activities include, but are not limited to:

Family dinners
1200 piece Jigsaw puzzles
Drunken midnight snowball fights
Morning hangovers complete with souvenir pancakes
Arts and Crafts
Yoga and Shredding
Game nights!!!
Unlimited recreation time for the INTERNET and Facebook!
Full-time photographer and videographer
Lots of fun and tons of memories

We interrupt this regularly scheduled hibernation to bring you Snowdiculous. Not to be confused with Snowpocalypse 2009, or Snowmageddon 2010. No. Those storms are both over. We've moved on the Snowdiculous, which is a mere minutes away from starting to drop 10-20 more inches on the already snowy district.

DC Residents, is this photo not one of the most terrifying ones you've ever seen? IT'S COMIN' FOR US!!



Monday's weather was a glorious 61, and somewhat sunny depending on what side of the district you were on. Sure, it looked sunny and gorgeous blue sky in Georgetown, but 3 miles up the road in Friendship Heights, The Clouds of Doom lurked. It was as if Mother Nature was giving us a sneak peak of what Spring would be like.

Photo by: kkairies
The mix of dark clouds and brilliant sun made for a gorgeous sunset over the Nation's Capitol last night, and my twitter feed came to life with mentions of brilliant oranges and reds filling the sky. Colorful sunsets are one of the things I miss the most about Florida. It may be hot as hell, but I'll be damned if they don't get some amazing color at dusk. And if you're on the coast? Forget All You Can Eat Crab night, you're too mesmerized to do anything other than stare at the bright pinks, purples, oranges, and reds that highlight the horizon. It's like God let the baby Cherubs go to town with the Crayola crayons in the sky.

When I first read that the weather would be all the way in the 60s, I was slightly disappointed. I'm the girl that moved away from Florida to avoid warm Januarys, what the heck is DC doing by warming up so much?! But then I realized I could leave without my coat, and you might as well have told me Chick-Fil-A was opening up next door, because diggity, my mood instantly skyrocketed.

Just like I wait for Christmas with baited breathe, come middle of January, I'm counting down the days 'til spring. Those delicious temperatures where it's not too cold, but not too hot. You'll want to take a sweater with you, but you don't have to worry about burning up the second you even think about putting it on. Mmm mmm good. But I digress...

I have some obvious trust issues, and I was too nervous to wear the summer skirt, in fear that the Weather Man was indeed lying to me. Instead, I pulled out the khaki capris (I don't care if you dislike them. They are love.), grabbed a short sleeve shirt, and a light sweater.

Did you read that? A light sweater. In January. In D.C..

I stepped out into that warm sunshine, felt that cool breeze, and it was total bliss. Seriously, how does anyone live anywhere where it's NOT like this all the time? I kick myself everyday for not applying to UC San Diego. I was all smiles all day.

Alas, as all good things do, the day had to come to an end. As soon as the sun set, we were back to the miserable cold. Someone obviously reminded Mother Nature, that it was actually still January, and happiness is not allowed in these parts until at least March. So she rounded off the dropping temperatures with rain. And wind.

And all I had was a light sweater.

Sometimes, I'll be sitting on the bus and I'll suddenly realize "whoa, I actually live here. In Washington D.C.." Do you ever have those surreal, I can't believe I'm a big girl, moments? I feel like I get them all the time.

A lot of the times, I feel like I'm still 12 years old, trying so hard to disguise myself as a grown-up. I've always ALWAYS wanted to play with the big kids. The little girl I work with is the exact same way. She's absolutely fascinated by the big girls at her playgroup. She'll follow them around and constantly ask if they want to play with her. Sometimes, they'll humor her, and play with her for a few moments, and then there are other times when they'll simply brush her off. This does not deter her. She'll march right up and ask them point blank what their problem is, and why are they being so grumpy?! I've got 20 years on her, and I'm only just now learning to stand up to the big girls!

Sometimes, I'm afraid I'll be found out, discovered as an imposter in this world full of adults and grown-ups. I'll have to explain myself, and hope that they understand I just wanted to be like them! The life they lead is so fancy and grown-up I just wanted to play in their world for a little while! I'm afraid people will think "Oh she's so young! She doesn't know anything about real life". Then I'm hit with the sudden realization that I am a grown-up. There's no pretending, and I have my own set of real, grown-up problems to deal with, and wow this is so not as fancy as I originally thought it would be! Sure, getting dressed up to meet for cocktails is fun at first, but then it's not so fun when you realize just how much money you spent on a single night out in the city! And Daddy is SO NOT willing to help you out. Yikes!

And then there are times when I think I'm a lot older that I really am. So many of my friends are getting married, and having babies, I feel like I'm way behind on the curve. I have to physically stop myself and say "Ohmygoshi! Get a grip! You're only 22!". I just can't win!

I'm teetering on the edge of being a kid and being an adult. I feel like it's a thin line between being too young and too old (and for the record, I'm not calling anyone in my life old!). But so often, we want to be the person next to us, and not the person staring back at us on the other side of the mirror. Please tell me I'm not the only one that struggles with feeling too young or old! If I am, I think I may have to invest in some serious therapy.

And that will only make me feel older than I really am!

"Oh, your brother is off skiing with the youth group this weekend" she says offhandedly.

"What?! Skiing?!" I say.

"Yes. And not only did he get someone in the church to sponsor him, but his friend also lent him some top of the line snow ski gear. Complete with the snow suit, face mask, iPod, and special headphones"

"WHAT?! That's crazy! I don't want to talk about this anymore, it's making me so jealous!!!!"

"Oh, don't be jealous, be happy for him!"

It's taken me a few days to recover from that last statement there. How many times in our lifetime have we been oh-so jealous of someone in our lives? I've been sitting here mulling it over, and the I've come to the realization that the more independent I become, and the more of my own money I spend, the easier it is to be swept up in a wave of jealousy for all the things I don't have.

It's incredibly difficult to be HAPPY! ALL the time! for everyone around you. Granted, I'm not always stewing in this pot of jealousy every minute of every day, but I'd be lying if I said that I was never jealous of some of the things that my friends have. And I'm not just talking about material items either. Also, I'm incredibly grateful for what I do have. I'm lucky enough to have a warm bed to cuddle up in, comfy sweats to relax in, and make enough money to get by. But, it's not my dream job, and it's not what I insisted on going to my fancy private university for.

It takes a lot to swallow that pill labeled JEALOUS on one side and PRIDE on the other, and just be happy. It's not that I don't love everyone in my life, I do. And I really am truly happy for them when great things happen. I am. I promise! It's just that after the excitement dies down, and it's back to just me and my crazy thoughts, I start to feel that sad feeling creeping up on me. Am I the only one that struggles with this?

This post isn't inspired by any one person in my life. It's not even inspired by a particular event either. Merely just taken from something a very wise person told me about not being jealous, but just being happy.

I suppose it's about that time that I do a post for 2010. So far, we're 18 days in to the new year! Congrats to making it this far!! So, tell me all about it, old friend. How've your last 18 days been?? Did Santa treat you well last Christmas? How are those resolutions coming? I think my favorite story was from my cousin who's New Year's Resolution lasted all of 45 minutes into the new year. Oh well, what can you do? Sometimes the drunk munchies are just too overwhelming, and the wings are powerful!

I kicked the new year off with a wedding (not mine, sadly enough. But I did manage to catch the bouquet that was thrown DIRECTLY AT MY FACE). After that, I hightailed it back to snowy DC, where I've spent the last two weeks hanging out with the most adorable, and articulate 2.5 year old and her 3 month old brother. Seriously, this kid is 2.5 going on 35. She speaks in full, clear, paragraphs, and if given the opportunity, I could quote her for days. I get chastised for being too silly, and she has to remind me that strollers are NOT race cars, and do NOT go vroom! You know it's bad when the little kid is telling you to be mature. We do all kinds of fun thing together, because I can only stand to read so many books and play with her play farm animals for so many hours, so we've taken field trips to the zoo, All Fired Up, and various play places. She's a hoot, and I'm so lucky to have found her, her rocking mom, and her sweet (albeit extremely cranky at times) brother. This little person provides endless entertainment, and countless laughs. She's a constant reminder to just how awesome little kids can be.

Is it just me, or does 2010 (twenty ten? two thousand ten?) seem to be The Year of The Wedding? As I mentioned, I was already at one wedding this year, I know of two more happening in April, I have a Save The Date on my board for May, I know there are multiple ones taking place in June, and at least one other friend is expecting something sparkly sometime this year. Um...hello single friends, where did you all go?? Not that I'm against getting married! I'm all for it, and all the lovely, mushy stuff that comes with it!! Yay for marriage! But really, did y'all have to go and do it at the same time? Oye! I only have one request: don't forget us single ladies and please make sure to invite all the groom's hot and single guy friends! This. Is. Key.

This year, I have narrowed it down to three areas of my life that need improving:
  1. Job
  2. Gym
  3. Love life
The JGL, if you will (NOT to be confused with The Jersey Shore's "GTL: Gym, Tanning, Laundry". That's an entirely separate post). That's all I want. Really. Is that too much to hope for? I certainly don't think so! This year is already starting to fly by. January is already half over!!! Before we know it, it will be April, and then June, and then October, and then Christmas again! Dear Father Time, please slooowww down a little, and give us some time to breathe! Who knows where I'll be this time next year. While I'm exactly where I wanted to be location wise, I'm certainly not where I wanted to be career wise. But, life happens, and I can't really remember the last time life actually went the way I originally planned.

Ohh how I've missed blogging. I really have. One would think that if I missed it so much, I would blog more often, but like I said to my mom about coming home "I have to leave in order to want to come back". It's true! The weight and pressure of having to post everyday is absolutely draining. It's nice to know, however, that when I do need it, my blog is still here for me to post all my mundane thoughts. So with that, I'll leave you with one of my favorite quotes from my new favorite 2.5 year old:

Her: Did you miss me?
Me: I did! Did you miss me???
Her: Yes. But, now we found each other, and we're together again.
Seriously, does it get any cuter than that?! Goodnight, folks!