Ohmygoshi
Warning, I'm in a crummy mood and there is an occasional use of the "F word". If easily offended, maybe skip today's blog.

So you know that slump I was in? Yeah, it's definitely taken a turn for the worse. For some reason, I've been mad at the entire world for the past few days.

It's pretty much been if you so much as breathe at me in the wrong way I'll bite your face off. I've been a real peach to be around.

I'm not really sure where this gross mood came from. It might have been on Thursday. I had dropped my car off the day before for a tune up, and when I get it back and drive away there's this awful screeching noise coming from it! Um...what? So I drove it all the way back to the mechanic the next day for him to look at it again. The whole thing just pissed me off. My car should not come back with problems after I just paid you a significant amount of money to do minor things to it. ARGH.

From there my mood just dived, and it's been on a continuous drop ever since. My brothers came home Thursday night, that probably didn't help. They can be such jackasses. They come in, drop their stuff IN FRONT OF THE DOOR and then walk away. And when I say "stuff" I mean two large duffel bags and backpacks. Thanks guys, my life isn't complicated enough without you leaving your stuff in my way.

I went to yoga last night, and that helped slightly. I came out in a much better mood. But then I went home. I came home from yoga at 6:55 and I was out the door by 7:15 and that includes a shower. My hair was not what I wanted it to be. The movie started at 7:20. We got there at 7:36. Then at the movie theater (which only has student rates on Thursday nights I might add...) the group I was with was sitting THREE ROWS FROM THE FRONT so I got a little lightheaded when I tried to follow the on screen action. After the movie, we went to chili's where the conversation was filled with the current state of our economy and how our whole system is bad now, but how it's about to get really bad. This was the analogy that was given to me: "Imagine there's a huge anaconda trying to swallow a whale. Right now, it's just trying to get the first bit in it's mouth, and it hasn't even begun to split it's guts yet" Um, thank you good sir for that lovely picture. Waiter? I'm going to need more liquor in this beverage. Thanks.

My friends don't call me back. This annoys me to no end. Even if you're super busy, can't you just send me a text or something? Please?

A few nights ago my laptop did some "automatic updates" and had to restart. That's fine, I was
going to bed anyways. The next morning I go to use it and all I see is the mouse on a black screen. So I restart. It never gets past the "Windows is loading" page.

FUCK. NOT. AGAIN.

Let's try uploading it in safe mode. Nothing.

DAMNIT.

Yesterday I wanted to use the upstairs computer and my brother (who was doing nothing besides staring at the screen) refused to let me on, saying that my computer not working wasn't his problem.

I finally call Tech support and after about 20 minutes the guy tells me it's most likely a hard drive problem and he'll have to send me a new one, and I'll lose all my files.

At this very same moment the television was playing, my mom was talking, and my brother was trying to ask my mom a question. I could feel my blood start to race through my veins and begin to boil. I had reached my breaking point. I cut the man off, asked him to hold on for just a sec, and then threw the phone at my mom and told her to deal with it because I just couldn't take it anymore. In my head I was screaming, FUCK YOU DELL. AND FUCK YOU WINDOWS. I HATE YOU, AND I BET MACS DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN. I'M SO BUYING A MAC NEXT TIME.

I HATE YOU, BILL GATES. IF I LOSE MY PICTURES AND FILES, I AM SENDING YOU THE BILL FOR MY DEPRESSION MEDICATION.

Then I went to bed.

Today has only been marginally better. I went to yoga, but it was especially hard and although my intention was to gain peace, I was again rushed out of the studio and then out of the house to go downtown to pick up the stupid car.

I have not been pleasant to be around, something I've been told multiple times the past few days. I do feel bad about that, which just further upsets me. I don't like being in a bad mood, and I wish the whole world wasn't pissing me off.

Please bare (bear? I'm not sure...) with me for a little bit. Any mood lifter suggestions would be highly appreciated and might even win you a spot on my "do not hate" list. Just try not to breathe in my direction and maybe we can get along.

I'm looking forward to Church tomorrow. I need some good stuff in my life, and I'm clearly not getting what I need right now.

HMPH.
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3 Responses
  1. Gooseberried Says:

    Hope you feel better and more cheery soon! :)


  2. chickbug Says:

    sending you happy thoughts! hope things start looking up.


  3. Stephanie Says:

    I hope things start getting better for you.
    Maybe try to read a good book to relax. Or take a bubble bath.


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